How to talk to people
Good day,¶
You either stumbled upon this post because you are having problems talking to people, or want to see how Jamil thinks! I have seen a lot of people have issues with how to talk and have conversations. Here is the (initial) algorithm for how to have an interesting and engaging conversation. If you think it should be updated or is missing something feel free to reach out to me and let me know how it can be improved!
Prerequisites: Understanding a priority Queue.¶
An example of a queue would be waiting in line at a cash register or at the DMV; however, in a priority queue, a "person" with high priority is served before a "person" with low priority. Some resources can be found here.
Priority Function and Input¶
The function used in the priority queue for conversation is defined as a function $f(x)$, such that $f$ determines the priority and $x$ is the subject and predicate in the last spoken sentence.
Example: I went to the park last week. ($x$ would be [picnic , park, last week]
and $f$ would be the priority of the topic and when to bring it up in conversation)
We define the priority function as: $f(x) = (\text{time_since_spoken(x)}^{-1}+\text{importance)} - \text{(how_often(x) - interest(x))}^2$ such that:
- time_since_spoken : when the topic was brought up
- importance : how interested $\textbf{THE PERSON YOU ARE TALKING TO}$ is in the topic
- how_often : how often the topic has been brought up
- interest : how interested $\textbf{YOU}$ are in the subject brought up
Reasoning¶
When having a conversation with people there are some things to pay attention to;
- Keep the conversation flowing
- Keeping the user engaged
- Not being repetative
- Being interested in the conversation
Algorithm¶
Note: The person you are talking to is also following this algorithm so they will ask you questions as well; it is common curtosy to answer any question that you ask.¶
Steps:¶
- ask the individual starter questions:
- This can be things such as: How are you? Tell me about yourself? or even ice breaker questions
- Add their responce to the Queue with a given Priority
- While(Queue not empty)
- Ask questions about the next thing on the queue or repeat what they have previously said in a questioning tone.
- Answer any question you ask as they are also using a PQ!
- Continue until a "quit word" is added or Queue is empty (if Queue is empty you probably messed up, thats ok though; you just need some more practise on how to continue conversations!)
Quit words are statments or words that signal the conversation is ending or coming to a close; common examples are as follows:¶
- well I should get going
- I have to head out
- I need to leave